Secretions Magnifiques

Finally tried it. It's a bad and nauseatingly artificial fragrance. It doesn't deserve the overly bad, or overly good reviews I've seen everywhere. Is it a tongue in cheek creation for talking about and not wearing, a marketing ploy that worked too well and everyone fell for it, a critique of consumerism, is it a masterpiece, or something I wouldn't care about if seemingly everyone didn't already have an opinion of it, except for me? I wish whoever created this, would hold onto concept, come back to the lab with better ingredients, and try again. I agree with giving unsafe and dangerous a chance, but this is bad and smells nothing like description.

I love this. I really don't get how people find this gross. I really think people are basing their review on the described notes rather than the actual smell. It's definitely has a raunchiness to it, but in the best way possible. I could randomly grab perfumes out of my collection and find several that smell much less safe that haven't received the criticism this one has. Perfume shouldn't be safe, it should be dangerous and sexual. If you want to smell good for your church or at the grocery store in the suburbs, this isn't for you. If you're looking to give head at the club, then try Secretions.

This has become my comfort scent.. it smells like privacy? It's so taboo to smell unwashed, with this perfume you can have your shower but smell your wrist in the middle of your busy shift and it takes you back to when you were lying in bed free bleeding and watching adult content. It pairs great with a very crisp clean appearance, otherwise people will think the scent is your own.

Extremely vile. Cold and painful sex with a bloodied corpse. I had to put it in the quarantine zone. Worth trying!

IMHO, this is the vilest, most repellent scent imaginable - brings to mind an ejaculating, bloody corpse. Creative and unique, yes, hence the two stars. But I think the world would have been a better place without it.

I was expecting something horrible and just intolerable, but it really more slightly off putting. Anything with a 'milk' note tends to like old yogurt, curdled milk awful and this is no exception. It opens with a heavy ripe fruit and sweet cream in a landfill kind of smell, then transitions into a dead ringer for the metallic smell of a raw pig's heart plus a little coconut. It stays like that for a bit. Nauseating but also intoxicating. It settles into a little of that and a fishy aquatic.

This one really does live up to its reputation -- ENORMOUS blood-rust-metallic accord up top running interference between you and a delicious floral-milky situation at the heart of things. You'll (eventually) climb off the rollercoaster laughing from sheer exhilaration and/or terror. But will you brave this particular amusement park again? One can definitely respect the engineering without wanting to repeat the experience -- but everyone should buy a ticket at least once. Epic weirdness.

On me, the opening note smells like the detergent that comes out of a bottle for blowing bubbles. This is followed closely by wet dog. In five minutes nothing changes, and I have to scrub it off. It repulses me. I have tried this twice, and this was the result each time. I have no idea what the heart or base might smell like. I don't want to know.

I tried with this one, really I did. I had smelled a bottle of it in Amsterdam and had wondered what all the fuss was about. Smelled fine to me. Even my husband thought it was pleasant! Then I got it and-wow. No scent has ever been this repulsive to me. It's wet dog, it's blood and gore, it's cold water on hot metal. I cannot wear this at all.

I sampled this at their store in Paris and had trouble with the harsh metallic note that seemed to sit directly on the roof of my mouth and then stay there for the next half hour. My boyfriend was excited by it because his nose seemed able to sort the different notes out and make sense of them as "a harsh but harmless funk" that would sit well with his own body odor. I am ultimately disappointed because I actually love certain hard to describe smells of a sexual nature. But this perfume is more like an artist's rendering of sex in metal and found objects and it's ultimately void of the organic material laden with tiny bacteria that actually produce the unique odors of a living human body. The nice man at the ELDO store told us that this was intended to be a concept fragrance, but it does have it's own loyal group of die-hard fans. I have to wonder how much the power of suggestion plays into some people buying bottle after bottle of this one.

Wow. Given all of the hysteria over this fragrance, I was mightily disappointed with my trial. I was not angry, or offended, or nauseated in the least. I am well familiar with the aroma of blood, and of semen, and of sweat and breast milk and vaginas... and I really detected little of these things here (certainly not in the punched-in-the-nose way that I was expecting given other reviews). I clearly smell the iris and coconut, and these inclined me to think that this is more of a feminine fragrance than unisex. There is also a pronounced salty note, and something vaguely metallic that made my think of nothing so much as a hospital gurney that had been deodorized with some sort of disinfectant. Secretions Magnifiques is, to my nose, not an appealing fragrance... there's definitely something deliberately unpleasant about it, so to that extent, the noses at ELdO have succeeded in making me unhappy. I wouldn't wear this, and I wouldn't want anyone I hang around to wear this, but not because it's confrontational in its evocation of sex and birth and death. No, I dislike it because it smells off somehow. I don't mind "edgy" fragrances (among my regulars are ELdO's Fat Electrician and EdI's Sienne l'Hiver, which are both charming oddballs)... but I will go for "edgy-pleasant" while eschewing "edgy-ugly." Secretions Magnifiques would fail as a new Lysol flavor... it fails stunningly as a fragrance to put on humans. I'm giving it two stars instead of one, because I admire ELdO's courage in their willingness to try to market something that simply smells badly.

Hardly vomit-inducing. Possesses a subtle sweetness from well-blended milk, coconut, and ripe-melon calone notes. Vaguely aquatic, with perhaps the faintest suggestion of fresh-caught fish. Could almost pass for a dryer sheet if it weren't for a short-lived, photorealistic rust metal note that appears before the drydown. Not exactly sexy unless you find run-down laundromats arousing. Interesting and not altogether unpleasant, but I'm left scratching my head as to when or where this should be worn.

I first tried this scent several years ago and absolutely hated it. I wanted to love it. I wanted to love it so bad but there was a saltiness that I just couldn't get past. Flash forward 3 years and I get a sample with the Santal No. 33 I ordered. I decide to give it another try and find it, or I, have been reborn. I don't know whether my chemistry changed or my nose has evolved but I absolutely adore this scent. It can still be a little..erm.."salty" right after application but within minutes it turns into a milky, slightly powdery, "I had sex right before I left my house" smell. My favorite way to wear it is to layer it with other perfumes. It brings this delicious edge to anything you put it with making spicy orientals down-right "Eyes Wide Shut" obscene and subverting the most saccharine scent into a school girl (of legal age!) with LaPerla under her uniform. You owe it to yourself to at least try a sample because, in those rare cases where it works, it really REALLY works.

Smelling it and disconnecting myself to what it's "supposed" to smell like helped me appreciate this scent so much more than I thought I ever would. It's bodily, yes, but its also extremely sexy and edgy. It's milky, but it doesn't go straight to my stomach as most people say. It's also sweet and marine fresh with coconut and a touch of iris. AMAZING AND LIVES UP TO HYPE.

This is one sexy beast of a fragrance! Carnality canned.Not to like this seems unnatural. To despise it simply implies that sex is probably not your strong suit. Some people are better at other things....like quilting.

This stuff is beyond horrific smelling. One to avoid at all costs.

Secretions Magnifiques! ...I had SO much fun for 2-3 days reading the hilarious reviews of this fragrance! Of course I HAD to give it a try. Imagine my surprise; this fragrance sets up beautifully on me! I love the complexity of the composition, and that I can follow it... The opening is a bit challenging; I find it exhiliarating. I actually like the metallic "rush" of the opening notes. Then it just becomes more beautiful: creamy, powdery, fresh oceanic; hint of iris; soft musky like dried rose petals; sandalwood. So soft and interesting! I'm addicted to it now, and had to order a full bottle! And I have had nothing but positive responses from others. Of course you are not going to drench yourself in a scent like this; a little goes a long way! Other "favorites" of mine are: Gres Cabochard, Niki de Saint Phalle, Clinique Aromatics Elixir, Jacomo Silences, Lancome Magie Noir, Chanel 19, Estee Lauder Azuree. You wouldn't drench yourself in any of these, either, but a little is amazing. On the lighter side I like Annik Goutal Eau d'Hadrien and M. Asam No. 1. So maybe if any of these set up well on you, Secretions Magnifiques is worth a try. It's my new favorite!

nauseating, disgusting! put some on my wrist and felt sick. could not wash it off, the scent stayed w me all day. Can't even describe the scent. Just HORRID

This reminds me of my days of working at the local public health hospital where I was tasked with the dubious honor of assisting those who were homeless and in need of medical care. The stench of this thing they call a perfume is just like the whiff i would get when my patients would peel off their pants. Smegma, body odor and yeast. That's is what it smells like. I warn all those who come into the unfortunate situation where they could possibly force their nose into a sample....RUN away! The scent (stink) will stay with you forever and you will rue the day... Great as a practical joke or if you want to ruin someone's day.

my nose wouldn't even let me taken in a full whfff...it's that upsetting to my olfactory senses. Of course once I read the reviews I felt compelled to smell the various bodily secretions in it - and smell them I did. Not offensive in an old-lady too perfumey kind of way...it's just plain not right at all. Had to go to Sephora about an hour after application and douse myself with an (gasp) over-the-counter fragrance favored by the masses. So wrong on so many levels.